Monday, July 11, 2011

Thoughts of a non-equity actor at an EPA

5:00 am
*Korean pop music begins blaring from phone*
...damn, I guess I'd better get up. Sucks I have to wake up the poor sleepy boyfriend to drive me to Flushing. I'd have stayed at my apartment for a shorter commute but we got home so late from the trip upstate that I crashed... Wait, what? He's already ready? How does-- nevermind. Where the hell is mah metrocard? Let's rock this shit.
Wow, I'm the only one here. This is weird. The doors are locked. Am I even in the right place?
Oh sweet, someone else. I guess we're supposed to form a line outside the building.
Yup. We do form a line outside the building. Now I feel bad texting Jen at the crack of dawn.
Need Starbucks. Need yogurt.
I made a joke about getting out of line and now I'm number four instead of first, but none of these other three girls laughed. I think they think I'm being passive aggressive. Now I'm self conscious. I will no longer try to make conversation and crack open a book instead.
I like Tolstoy. I'm going to tweet about Tolstoy and auditioning and how I'm sitting in the street.
Great, I'm that girl. The one obnoxiously curling her eyelashes. In her phone reflection. In the middle of the sidewalk.
Wait, there's dudes here too. I thought this was just a female call. Now I'm confused. Maybe they're having a call for another show today as well.
Talked to the girl behind me about how neither of us have been to an EPA in ages. ...great, now I have to... Er... well, uo yao bang sai. Bu hao. Very bu hao. (for those who are unfamiliar with the Chao Zho dialect, "bang" means to, er, "make" and sai is... well, "shit".
Can't get outta line, but desperately need to bang sai. Considering running back to nearest Starbucks.
I am entrusting a complete stranger with my stuff while I run south two blocks to the Marriott Marquis. It's bringing back a lot of memories of when I used to come here as a little kid with my grandma and mother. ...geez, what a spoiled kid. Aw look, tourists, how adorable, they look confused.
Returning to line. Bang sai completed successfully! Ten points for Ravenclaw!
Omg we're going in
AAAAUGHH I SIGNED THE 'CAMELOT' FORM INSTEAD OF THE RIGHT ONE AND CROSSED MY NAME OUT and now they're going to think I am sufficiently mentally handicapped that I can't read the right form. Maybe I should bring in War and Peace to prove that I can read big words and am not actually mentally handicapped.
I'm first in the list for this show! This never happens. Maybe this is an unpopular show. Wait, it's brand new.
Sitting next to the same girl I sat next to at the Godspell open call. What is my life
Holy balls she's from Texas and has done Casa Mañana work. WHAT IS MY LIFE
I am slowly realizing that I'm way too young to be auditioning for this role. Why can't I be like those girls who look thirty and sexy in their teens? I'm doomed to play preteen roles for eternity.
And now we play the waiting game.

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